Wednesday, April 28, 2010


Marianne Cutchins and Lynette Lewis
Friday, May 7, 2010
7:00 pm
Slate Canyon LDS Building
1500 E 800 S, Provo

Just a little advertising...Come if you can!

Saturday, April 17, 2010


Nineteen and a half years ago, I became a mother for the first time. When Paul was born, I was scared. I was scared of hurting him, of not knowing how to take care of him, and of being the kind of mommy that could raise a baby to be a man. How on EARTH do you do that?

I figured out pretty quick that you do it one day at a time. Sometimes one step, or even, on the really bad days, one breath, at a time. And one day your baby is a man. Just like that.

But last night, in the middle of the night, as I worried about this and that, I started thinking about my little man. And about all the breaths and steps and days that have gone by. I thought back to when it all started, and I thought about where he was then, and where he's been, and where he is now.

Five weeks early, and
just a few hours old.
He looks pretty scared, if you ask me!

He was a cranky baby,
but his smile lit up my heart.
Still does.

Here he is just after his first birthday.

When he was almost three,
we had these photos taken.
When they came back,
I couldn't believe how gorgeous he was.
I looked at this photo, and I wondered
how any parent could possibly love a child more
than I loved mine.

Photos we had taken for
Daddy's birthday present.
How cool to have matching purple shirts with your Mom!

Now he's four and wants to do EVERYTHING
that Dad does.

At age almost six.
He's going to go to school soon.
I don't know if I can stand to be apart from him
all day long.
I cried and cried his first day of school.

At Mark and Anja's wedding,
my brothers entertained themselves
during the bride and groom's photo shoot
by tossing Paul.
He loved it.

Kindergarten pictures.
No front teeth and proud of it!

First Grade.
We had moved from Florida,
so he was at a different school than Kindergarten.
And then we moved in the middle of the year,
so he finished the year at his third school in two years.
Kinda hard times for a little guy.

Second Grade.
He got baptized, and I was so proud of him.
I worried that he didn't understand the covenants he was making.
My visiting teacher told me that if we waited to understand
all the covenants we make
before we make them,
we would never make any at all.

Third Grade.
This was that last year that Paul was really happy in school.
After this, is was ALL downhill.

Fourth Grade.
He's so cute!
And he was miserable at school,
every day.
It started to show at home.

Fifth Grade.
School was a little better this year,
but the damage had been done,
and he never really recovered.
But what a great kid.

Sixth grade.
LOVED his teacher.
Had good friends,
starting to look like a teenager.

Seventh Grade.
This picture makes me laugh.
It remindes me that
the day before he started Middle School,
he got his finger bitten by a cockatoo.
What a way to start Seventh Grade!

Eighth Grade.
He's wearing his "Elite Hobos" shirt.
It's their Scout Troop Patrol.

Ninth Grade.
He's in High School now.
He's stubborn, but I still managed
to make him get a haircut.
It was the last one for many years.

Tenth Grade.
He's playing football,
Goes to school, but hates it.

Eleventh Grade.
Here comes the hair.
He's famous for the hair.
I have to admit,
it's gorgeous.

Twelfth Grade.
He's a senior.
He's struggling BAD to be able
to graduate.
Among other things.
I pray a lot and I cry.
A lot.

And he made it.
Under his mortar board,
he is now sporting a mohawk.
Here he is, one of hundreds of seniors,
receiving his diploma
and handing the principal and handful of
Senior prank.

I didn't mention
his Eagle Scout
or his great friends
or his motorcycle (and the crash)
or Nuclear Hearse
or what a superb big brother he is.

And since then, he went to Alaska to work for several months, he saved (some of) his money, and now he's on a mission. How did we get here? When did this happen? It's out of my hands now, and I wonder if I did all I could do. Did we teach him what he needed to know? Did we prepare him well enough? And does he know that I love him even more than I did when he was that tiny, scared preemie?

Now he's working hard and serving the Lord and loving the people. He's doing great. I couldn't be prouder. And I couldn't miss him much more.

I love you, my boy.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Spring Has Sprung

What better time to post about Easter Sunday than the Sunday after Easter?

We awoke to a beautiful snowy spring morning, watched Conference, colored our Easter Eggs, and waited for the snow to melt so we could have an egg hunt. The snow didn't melt in the backyard (which was OK because we haven't cleaned up the dog doo for a while...), but it did melt in the front yard, so we hunted out there. BIG DUD. No good hiding places, and the boys vetoed ever hunting out front again. Enjoy the day in photos!

Snowy backyard

Hard at work...

Silly Isaac....
notice the Cub Scout stamp on his forehead?

Pretty Kate.
She takes the l-o-n-g-e-s-t time
deciding how to do her eggs!

He pretended to, but he really didn't.

Wade has Paul's same goofy sense of humor.

Dennis is like Kate.
Very deliberate with his egg coloring.


(Paul always used to make a POO egg.
This is in honor of Paul.)

So is this.

These are my eggs.
I love them.
And they made delicious deviled eggs.

Isaac took a little nap.

See how excited they are for our egg hunt?

Hunting in the cold!

See all the great hiding places I found!!

Kate was willing to at least
that she was having fun!

Isaac actually did have fun
filling his bag as fast as he could.

I love egg hunts!!

Happy Easter, everyone!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Mommy's Time Out

One of the good things about being married to an academic is the occasional conference trip. Each year Dennis attends the ACA/PCA conference. Sometimes, if I can get away, I go with him, and this was one of those years. Not only could I get away, I needed to get away. So we hugged the kids and left them with Uncle Adam and Aunt Laura, and headed to St. Louis.

We visited the Gateway Arch.
That thing is just plain amazing.

This picture was taken up in the observation deck.
It's a little bit deceptive, because here,
I am calmly looking out the window,
down at the city below.
What I did not post was a picture of the previous
ten minutes,
in which I stood in the middle of the deck,
breathing deeply and trying not to panic,
and barely holding back the tears.
I'm proud to say that
I decided since I was all the way out in Missouri,
and I was all the way up in the top of the arch,
that I might as well get over it and have a look.
The heart palpitations weren't all that bad...

Brave girl!!
Good girl!!
You deserve a long nap.
(Thank you very much! Don't mind if I do!!)

And it was SO worth it!!
Look at that view.

Here we are!

Dennis had no problem with the height.
He LOVED it up there!!

Back on terra firma.
I took a LOT more photos.

It's just a really COOL place.

Especially in April when the weather is fine,
and it's not too hot,
and it's not that crowded.

Back at the conference,
Dennis had a little work to do.
He's awesome.

I didn't photograph the fantastic meals we ate, or the long naps I took, or the bright pink nail polish I used, but rest assured, I did all those things. And did them well.

I also didn't photograph the horribly turbulent flight we had from St. Louis to Denver, and the little green paper bag I held for most of the flight. There was no need to photograph the cancelled flight from Denver to Salt Lake, nor the sprint from gate A-68 to A-36 for a different flight on a bigger plane that would fly higher than the altitude where the high winds were causing all that turbulence. There was no need to take pictures of the huffing and puffing that went into catching that flight and getting home a few hours later than planned! I did, however, feel the need to photograph Utah Valley as we made our approach to Salt Lake.

Nestled in the tops of the mountains.

And Wade had a surprise for us when we returned...

What a beautiful giant golden carp
you've caught, Wade!
He's really big!!
No, you can't keep it.

And that's my time out. Man, I feel better.