The Cutchins Clan

Wordless Wednesday

2012-02-01T06:30:00.005-07:00

Happy Golden Days

2012-01-29T20:27:00.008-07:00

I can't even begin to describe all the wonderful and beautiful things that have happened to me in the past week. I think these are what will be called, some day in the future, the happy, golden days of yore.

It all started last Thursday when poor Wade got his braces on:

Meanwhile, Dennis is busy, busy, busy trying to get Paul's room finished. We did not make it, but we did the best we could. And it has certainly helped give Paul something to do while he gets his post-mission feet back on the ground!

And then, on Friday, oh glorious day!! He came home at last.

The hard part of that day was that Kate wasn't there. She was in Ogden rehearsing for the All-State Orchestra concert that was coming up on Saturday afternoon. So after our emotional reunion at the airport, we drove up to Ogden for one more emotional reunion.

And one more reunion. An important one.

What a wonderful day. We are so glad he's home! And then back up to Ogden Saturday (in the pouring rain and blizzarding snow) for Kate's concert. It was absolutely FAN-tastic.

Sunday was Paul's homecoming. He gave a nice talk, and I was so proud of him. He's grown up some, but he's still our funny, clever boy. It was wonderful to see so many of his friends, and meet some new friends, and it was also nice to eat lots of delicious cookies and other yummy treats while we visited. It was a really, really nice day.

So we had a few days to breathe, and then Wednesday, Kate was a soloist for her high school's Concerto/Aria concert. She was a little nervous, and I was a little nervous (OK, so I cried right before the concert started because I SO wanted everything to be perfect for her), but she has worked so hard, and she was so prepared. And it was lovely. Really, really lovely. She did such a good job, as did the other soloists. SUCH a great night.

So you see, these really are the happy golden days. I am so lucky.

Worldess Wednesday...(with 52 minutes to spare)

2012-01-25T23:12:00.000-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2012-01-18T18:47:00.000-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2012-01-11T20:18:00.000-07:00

Wordless...Friday...

2012-01-06T00:29:00.003-07:00

Oh, You Poor Blog!

2012-01-05T10:13:00.001-07:00

You are a pathetic little thing, aren't you? I love you so much, really I do, but I just haven't had much time to spend with you lately.

I have a great photo for yesterday's Wordless Wednesday, but (shhh) right now I'm at work so I can't post it, since said photo is at home.

And when I'm at home, I'm trying to teach my students, and make dinner, and get the Christmas stuff put away, and put back all the non-Christmas stuff that is piled on the chairs, and I want to clean the blinds and wash the windows since it's so warm and sunny--it's making me feel all nesty.

And Paul will be home in 15 days, which is completely surreal to me. You know, you spend your whole life looking forward to something, and one day, it happens. Like if your little tiny baby son grows up and then he goes on a two year mission, and then pretty soon, it's only 15 days until he comes home, and you're super excited, but you don't really know what to do about it, because it's just one of those great big things. I can't believe we're here!

Whoa, life! Slow down!!

I need to buy blinds for Paul's new bedroom, which isn't finished by the way. We're still at studs! I also need to buy some new bedding, and a dresser and a bookshelf or desk or something. The drywall, painting, carpet, and doors are up to Dennis.

I should probably plan some food for the open hosue, too. Hmmm. There's more to do than I thought!

So, poor little blog, I'll have to tell you later about Kate's plans to audition for the School of Music. I'll have to tell you later about Wade's broken finger. I would love to, but probably won't have the time, to tell you about our lovely Christmas and our fun New Year's.

I would also love to tell you about my most recent mid-life crisis (I keep having these...what does that mean?!). I would love to expound on the mysteries of the universe, like why cute little children grow up to be annoying teenagers, and how we end up loving them just the same, if not more. I would like to tell you my philosophy about New Year's Resolutions, and why I never make them. I would like to discuss my plans for getting my flute overhauled, and tell you how excited I am to go to Disneyland in a few weeks!!

However, I need to get back to work, and when I get home from work, I'll probably forget all about you. I'll try super hard to put up my Wordless Wednesday picture from yesterday, but I'm not making any promises. It's like a New Year's Resolution, and I'll break it, so I'm not even going to make it.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-12-28T21:41:00.000-07:00

The Rest of the Story

2011-12-23T12:09:00.002-07:00

Last week, the third graders sang at the Mall. They were SO cute. They did a really good job. The teachers really prepared them well, and the children were very well-behaved. During the performance, between songs, Mrs. K pointed to one of the boys and mouthed, "Are you OK?" He just stood there, staring blankly. He was quite pale. Mrs. S, a mom helper, and her husband, an EMT, quietly swooped in and helped the little pale man down from the risers. He was OK, just a little shaky--maybe he had his knees locked, or maybe he was just nervous...

But the show must go on, and the children continued their program. After the little pale man incident, it occurred to me that I should keep a close eye on Isaac. You just never know in these situations!

So he sang along, just as he had been instructed to do. Even though he HATES performing in public, or anywhere, for that matter, he cares a lot about doing what he is supposed to be doing so he doesn't get in trouble. I noticed him wiggling his legs so his knees wouldn't lock, and I noticed that he didn't put his hands in his pockets, even though I knew he wanted to!

During the second to last song, I noticed that he kept looking at his hands. He'd bring his hands up in front of him and study his fingers, then he'd look back up and continue singing. He did this several times, and my Mom Radar was wondering, "What is he doing?!" After one of these hand-studying episodes, he looked back up, but his eyes moved really slowly, and he had stopped singing. At that moment, I thought to myself, "Does he look pale? Yes, I think he does look pale!" He just stood there, staring blankly, while I got from somewhere in the middle of the second row to his side in zero seconds flat. My sincere apologies to all the people I'm sure I stepped on or clobbered with my purse...

I grabbed his arm just as his knees buckled, but he was GONE. I couldn't keep him from falling, but I slowed him down. Mr. and Mrs. S were there almost as fast as I was, and Mr. S caught him from behind before he toppled the kids off the riser behind him. Mr. S picked Isaac up and carried him off to the side. I tried to take Isaac from his arms, but I'm not strong, and I had a purse and a camera in the way. So I just sat down on the floor and Mr. S put Isaac on my lap. Mrs. S took Isaac's Santa hat and cute woolen scarf off him, and I pulled his shirt up so he could get some cool air on his skin. I blew on his forehead and pushed his fuzzy hair back, and I noticed that he was really clammy. Poor baby! I scooted him off my lap and let him lay on the cold tile of the mall floor.

His eyes had started fluttering open, and I said, "I'm right here, babe. Mommy's right here. Everything's going to be OK." His eyeballs were rolling around and he wasn't quite focusing yet. By this time, Dr. O, the principal, was there, and the program was over and the third graders were filing past us, and everyone kept asking, "Is he OK? Is he going to be all right?"

Dr. O offered to carry Isaac out to the car, and although I would have loved to do it myself, I couldn't have done it. So he so kindly and gently carried my little pale man halfway across the mall parking lot to our car. By now Isaac was talking, and he asked, "Where's my coat? Is my coat still on the bus? I want to go home..."

I told him we would go get his coat, and that I would take him straight home. I asked him if he remembered what happened. He did not. I asked him why he had been looking at his hands, and he showed me the two little open blisters on his middle fingers, where he had rubbed them raw with him thumbs during the program. I asked him why he did that, and he said it was because he was so nervous. I also asked him if he'd eaten his lunch. He had not. He was too nervous.

He told me that the numbness had started in his legs, and when it got to his face, everything went black. Apparently that happened pretty close to the beginning of the second to last song, because he doesn't even remember singing any of it. He was worried that he had hurt the children standing near him, but I assured him that no one got knocked down and that everyone was OK. He was embarrassed at first, but then after Mrs. B, his teacher, called the house to see if he was OK, he decided that fainting during the Third Grade Christmas Program was pretty cool after all.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-12-21T07:14:00.003-07:00

I Have an Idea...

2011-12-17T20:05:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking of instituting a different "blog theme" for each day of the week.

So Wednesday is obviously "Wordless Wednesday." When I do it, of course...

I haven't really come up with anything for the other days of the week yet. Except Saturday. I have a theme for Saturday.

Are you ready?

Here it comes...

STUPID SATURDAY!

What do you think? A good idea? I think so. I could tell about all the big plans I have for the day, and then relate how, through circumstances that are usually completely beyond my control, I don't ever accomplish the things I need to do.

It always starts out with a major case of physical and emotional fatigue. Add a house that hasn't really had any attention for at least a week, overflowing laundry hampers, Sunday School lessons that need preparing, kids that need rides, a neighbor who needs a little help with something, a fridge that is strangely devoid of anything edible, and you're on your way to a perfect STUPID SATURDAY.

Throw in there a little bit of unfinished Christmas shopping, choir dress mending, random dumb errands, and there you have it. It's another STUPID SATURDAY. I have them almost every week, and it puts me in a sour mood that usually lasts about a week, until another STUPID SATURDAY comes along.

Is 8:00 too early for me to go to bed?

Proud Mama

2011-12-10T11:34:00.003-07:00

See my beautiful daughter and her wonderful friends? I'm so proud of them.

Six Weeks and Counting

2011-12-09T11:11:00.003-07:00

From this, nearly two years ago:

Through all that, to this:

42 DAYS...

But who's counting?

Wordless Wednesday and Some Other Stuff

2011-12-07T17:10:00.000-07:00

*****

And other stuff:

For anyone local, or anyone who will be local in February, I have SIX (6) tickets for the Peking Acrobats on February 3, 2012, which I will not be able to use because I am fleeing to Disneyland. The performance will be in the DeJong Concert Hall in the Harris Fine Arts Center at BYU. Starts at 7:30 p.m., and these are really great seats. I am selling them for exactly what I paid for them, minus the dumb service fee--$166.00.

Anyone interested?

A Nightmare

2011-10-28T06:14:00.009-06:00

In my dream, I was sitting on the floor with Dennis; he was behind me and I was leaning on his chest. Wade and Isaac were playing nearby with some kind of action figures. They were using boxes for tables.

Dennis said, "I have something I have to tell you." I listened and Wade and Isaac continued to play.

He then confessed to me that he was married to someone else. He had been for the whole of our nearly 23 years together. In my dream, the breath I took was literally painful. It was a shudder full of knives and broken glass. He was crying, and I couldn't breathe. I said, "Who is she? Where is she?!"

I jumped up and turned to face him. Wade quietly gathered the action figures and said to Isaac, "Come on, Isaac. Let's go play somewhere else."

I looked out the dream window and it was raining. I wondered where Kate was. I wondered how my husband could be married to someone else when he is clearly married to me. I wanted him to tell me how it all worked, how it all happened, how I could have fallen in love with him when he was married to someone else. How he could have fallen in love with me when he was married to someone else.

He was trying to speak but his words wouldn't come out. He was blubbering. I thought it was fitting. I wondered how I would support myself after I divorced him, because I WILL NOT stay married to someone who is also married to someone else. Duh. I also knew that we would have to cancel our Disneyland trip because Disneyland is no fun when your husband is married to someone else. Duh.

Then I looked around at my blubbering husband and the unfamiliar apartment in which we found ourselves, and the empty boxes, and I thought, "Hey! I don't live here. This is not my house, and these are not my boxes. This is a very bad dream!"

And I took a new breath that did not hurt, and I walked out the door of that place.

I opened my eyes and looked around the dark bedroom. Dennis was cuddled up next to me, like he is every night, and the little solar light he put in the window for me was glowing softly. I could see the shadowy blades of the ceiling fan he installed last summer when I fussed that I was too hot. His book proposal that I read for him last night was sitting on the dresser, and my half-eaten Caramello bar was oozing caramel on a piece of foil that I left on my dressing table. I almost woke Dennis up to make sure he wasn't married to anyone else, but my easy breathing assured me that he isn't. So I closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

One of Life's Payoffs

2011-10-27T09:57:00.003-06:00

Last night I went to the Orchestra Concert at the High School. I go to all of the Orchestra Concerts, and the Band Concerts, and the Choir Concerts at the High School. Next year I probably won't go to any.

My beautiful daughter plays in the Band and the Orchestra, and she sings in two different choirs, so there has been a healthy helping of concert attendance in my life the past few years. Kate will be graduating this spring, so I am anticipating that there won't be many, if any, concerts for me next year. That's actually a bittersweet thought.

So I'm sitting in the auditorium last night, thinking about my numbered days at these events, and my mind wandered back to when Kate first started playing. She was in the 4th grade, and she was pretty shy about playing in front of anyone, including me. She would cry when she was practicing because it was hard to get any tone at all, let alone a good one. But she struggled along, and pretty soon, she was getting it to work. She practiced well, and we had pretty regular lessons. She would play for Grammy and Grandpa if I would let her hide behind the chair while she played (so no one could see her...) We played the little duets that came along in her lesson books, and it was fun for both of us.

Fast forward to now, after dozens of festivals and concerts and recitals and rehearsals, when she will be playing the Gordon Jacob Concerto No. 2 (III and IV) with the Orchestra in January, she is preparing her Senior Recital, and she sightreads Kuhlau duets with me for fun. And last night, while I was thinking these kinds of thoughts, the Orchestra began playing Bizet's Carmen Suite. And this beautiful sound floated out above the Orchestra--a soaring, singing tone. The tone of my dreams. It was Kate, and she sounded so wonderful. I remembered the days when there were tears, I remembered the lessons where I picked on her to do better and to work harder, and all at once, the winding road that led her to this moment was clearly visible to me. It is a road we have walked together, my girl and I, and the joy of the journey has never been more apparent to me than it was last night as I listened to her play. And I cried. Oh, the tears flowed down my cheeks, because I was so incredibly proud of her.

It was a Payoff. One of those moments in life where you can see that all the hard work and the struggle and the sacrifice were worth it, and you get a glimpse of the beautiful possibilities for the future. My girl will be graduating and moving on, and we won't get as many moments as we have had in the past. But I will always remember last night as one of the best ones. EVER.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-10-26T12:11:00.000-06:00

ca. 2001

Wordless Wednesday

2011-10-19T07:15:00.001-06:00

Telling My Story

2011-10-17T11:19:00.000-06:00

Last night, I watched 17 Miracles for the first time. In spite of the goofy comments from my children (and husband--they were on a roll last night...), I was SO moved and inspired by the faith and the determination and the sacrifice of those people. That, in conjunction with a lesson we had in Relief Society about telling our family's stories, got me to thinking. (A dangerous pasttime, I know!!)

Who is going to tell my stories? I tell some of them to my children, in fact, we tell a lot of stories. But I don't think any of them are written down. I was telling a story yesterday while we were driving up the canyon to see the beautiful, brilliant fall colors, and Kate even said, "Mom, you should write that down!" And do you want to know what's really sad? I can't even remember, less than twelve hours later, what story I was telling her!! What is going to happen to my family history if I can't even remember twelve hours, let alone a lifetime of memories?

So, in the spirit of telling my stories, I have decided that I might try telling some of them here. I print out my blog each year, so it would be a permanent-ish record, that my children could have, and since I like blogging better than writing in my journal, I might actually do it!

So, here's one of my stories:

I am one of eight children in my family. I am the 2nd child, the oldest girl, and until I was 13 years old, the only girl. I love my brothers. But growing up the only girl had its challenges. I had six brothers before I got my longed-for and dreamed-of sister. My poor youngest brothers had to put up with being my very own personal live baby dolls, complete with being dressed up in little dresses and riding in my baby carriage. They were my special little buddies, and I loved them fiercely. My older brother and I had a special relationship in that he was very protective of me, which was fine when I was five, but by the time I was a teenager, I didn't appreciate as much. Plus, he teased me mercilessly, which I also didn't appreciate that much. My brother two down from me was the most loving, cute, mischievous little demon child, and he also teased me. I beat him up regularly, so I suppose I wasn't the ideal big sister either...

But what I needed was a best friend. A true friend to stand by and who would stand by me. Someone who would never tease me, and who would never criticize me, but would give me sound advice and honest feedback. Someone to share my secrets with. My brother, Vaughn, who is two years my junior, but a good twelve inches my senior, was the peacemaker in our family. Calm, cheerful, easy-going, he was the polar opposite of my worried, stressed, and grouchy self. But somehow, it clicked. One day, when I was about ten and he was eight, we were riding in the big orange and white van with the rest of the family. I think we were on a family vacation, but I'm not positive about that detail. We were sitting in the back seat--the one that if Dad drove over a bump, we would fly up into the air (this was in the days before seat belts--I don't think that van even had seat belts!!) and our heads would crack the cardboard roof of the van's interior. I think my Dad had just hollered , for the umpteenth time, at the general population to STOP FIGHTING AND FUSSING BACK THERE FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE! I'm sure DON'T MAKE ME STOP THIS CAR was included.

At that moment in my childhood, something happened that changed my life forever. I don't know if it was Vaughn's idea or mine, but we turned to each other, there in that bouncy back seat, and said, "Let's be best friends forever." And we promised to never, ever fight with each other, or be mean to each other, or ever hurt each other. We smiled at our newfound best friend-ship. And that was that.

And we have kept our promise to this day. Vaughn has never hurt me. I hope he can say the same about me. We never fought. He has been there for me, and I have been there for him. We walked home from school together, we snuck out of the house late at night together, we stayed awake with each other when the other couldn't sleep. We went on double dates together, and we supported each other through stupid relationships and inevitable heartbreaks.

Vaughn has special relationships with all his brothers, and his other sister, too. And I have special relationships with all my brothers, and especially my angel sister. But somehow, throughout my life, that one little moment in the orange van was the answer to my prayers for a best and bosom friend. I hope he's not offended if I say that he is the Diana to my Anne. I never had a best bosom girl friend, so my little brother stepped it up and did it for me. And I am eternally grateful.

Wade and Isaac, if you ever read this, take my advice and make the same promise to each other. It will change your life.

All I Need

2011-10-13T06:02:00.001-06:00

Here is what I need:

Here is what I have:

Poop.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-10-12T10:20:00.000-06:00

2:48 on a Sunday Afternoon

2011-10-09T15:06:00.000-06:00

Church goes from 1:00 to 4:00.

I'm clearly not there.

I feel SUPER guilty.

I'm a church SLUFFER. I'm truant. It's an unexcused absence! Do you think it will affect my grade?

Some days I can only do so much, you know? I had to do all the chores I would have normally done on Saturday on Friday, because on Saturday I was up in Salt Lake all day with Kate for All-State Choir. Didn't get home until almost 11:00, and fell in to bed exhausted. Dennis and Wade weren't even home yet from the BYU football game. Whose stupid idea was it to have the game so late? Got up this morning--Dennis already gone to meetings, kids all need showers, need to fix dinner before church so we can eat right after church because we have company coming over. Choir practice is right before church, so I have to leave an hour before everyone else.

Kate is going up to the airport to drop off Romain, and I've been teary all morning just thinking about it.

Andy came home from his mission on Friday--saw him at church today--he looks GREAT. And he's home. That means Paul will be home soon, and we still don't have a place to put him. Are returning missionaries offended when they come home and have to sleep on the couch?

So I just feel overwhelmed. I'm tired. (I'm hungry, too...that can't help matters, now can it?) Life is good. But it's busy. And I feel like I need a break.

But you know what they say...NO REST FOR THE WICKED.

And as proof that I'm wicked, I'm skipping church.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-10-05T08:47:00.002-06:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-09-28T06:09:00.001-06:00

STRESS

2011-09-27T21:27:00.000-06:00

I'm feeling VERY stressed these days. I have bad dreams about people jumping off the top of very, very tall water slides, or else my children are super heroes and have to fight battles and I can't help them--in fact, I am scared and so I run away. I cry at work every day, and I hope no one notices. I have back pain (again or still, whatever), and foot pain, too. I have sullen and sassy teenagers. Isaac cries before he goes to school. My son is coming home from his mission in about four months and we have no place to put him. My house is dirty and I don't have time to clean it. My daughter invited friends over for dinner the other day, and I had no food to feed them with (who EVER heard of serving fish and spaghetti??? It was embarrassing).

There's too much to do, and I don't feel like doing it.

Although, I can throw a mean pity party, and apparently, it's in full swing. Come on over!!

Wordless Wednesday

2011-09-21T21:30:00.000-06:00

If You Insist...

2011-09-15T09:12:00.000-06:00

OK. I knew that photo would ellicit some interest, and I apologize for keeping you all in suspense! There's really only one thing that needs to be said about that picture of my sweetheart's forehead.

Cancer.

And you can thank me for NOT posting the photo of his neck. That one was pretty nasty. Twice as long, and you know...on his neck.

I've kind of been sitting on this news, because I didn't really want to talk about it. There's lots of good news here, so we feel very positive, but still, it's a scary conversation to have to have in ANY form. It's basal cell carcinoma, which is the most common form of skin cancer, and NON melanoma, so it rarely spreads, metastasizes, or kills. WHEW.

He's getting those stitches out this morning, and the doctor will let him know if they got all the cancer when they removed that chunk of his head. The doctor said that they did get it all when they did the one on his neck. So we're feeling pretty good, all things considered.

And you must know, Dennis has been quite happy going around telling people that his wife whacked him in the head with a frying pan...

He's such a funny guy.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-09-14T19:40:00.000-06:00

Potty Pod

2011-09-08T12:28:00.003-06:00

When Isaac needs to take a potty break, he'll often take Dennis's or my iPod along for entertainment. I assumed he was playing Plants vs. Zombies or watching Phineas and Ferb on NetFlix.

Apparently, I was mistaken.

I wonder how iPods do with Clorox wipes??

Wordless Wednesday

2011-09-07T19:31:00.000-06:00

Blessed and Grateful

2011-09-03T10:55:00.000-06:00

Last night Kate and I went to a concert at the University. We do that a lot. Sometimes it's me and Kate, sometimes it's me and Dennis, sometimes I torture the boys and make them come, too. But I love these outings. I love the time I get to spend wtih my daughter, or my husband, or my whole family. These are special times.

When I go to these concerts, I usually cry. At some point during the night, my soul overflows with joy and gratitude, and the tears flow. To hear these performers, to be a part of the music, to be able to listen and enjoy... I just can't help it. I cry.

I feel so blessed, and so grateful, that there is this kind of beauty in the world. And that I have the opportunity, here in little old Provo, to hear some of the world's great artists, and to hear some of the world's greatest art.

Want to see what I'm talking about?

Brian Stokes Mitchell

Chanticleer

Dawn Upshaw

Frederica Von Stade

The King's Singers

Lea Salonga

You see how lucky I am? I have been there. I have seen them. I have heard their voices. And this is just the past couple of years, and just the professionals. The BYU groups make me cry, too. Maybe even more, because they are my friends. Holst, Shostakovich, Dvorak, Strauss, Prokofiev, Beethoven, Brahms, Mahler. Such wonderful music, such amazing performers, such thrilling performances.

So you see. I am blessed.

And I am grateful.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-08-31T16:29:00.001-06:00

I'm Distracted

2011-08-25T21:09:00.001-06:00

I sat down to do a little blog post about the busy beginnings to the school year, but Kate is watching one of my favorite movies, and I can't even concentrate. Anyone want to venture a guess?

"For Heaven's Sake! Can't a girl get a word in edge-wise? After all, they're my public, too!!"

"What's the matter? Am I dumb or something?"

"What do you know about it, you... you piano player! Are you anybody??"

"Now that I know where you live, I'd like to see you home!"

"Then everybody was a dope."

"Well of course we talk! Don't everybody?"

"I...I...I make more money than, than Calvin Coolidge! PUT TOGETHER!!"

OK, I have to go. I gotta watch....

Wordless Wednesday

2011-08-24T23:21:00.001-06:00

WARNING: There is a new post here.

2011-08-22T12:02:00.004-06:00

Don't fall out of your chair or have a heart attack or anything, but I think I'm going to put up a new post today! After a month of recovery from vacations and Girls' Camp, I feel ready to rejoin the blogging world. Why now, you ask?

Well, because today I cried. I started crying just before midnight, and I cried off and on all night, and I've cried several times this morning, and it's not even noon yet! (What a pansy!)

I cried because my beautiful baby girl is starting her senior year of high school. And she's so lovely and smart and she's doing amazing things--I just don't know what happened to the last seventeen years.

I cried because my little round-headed bundle of fishing joy started middle school today. He's tall and he has a little mustache (which gratefully he shaves off every few days), and his voice is low and he's not a little boy any more.

I cried because my little Isaac, my baby, went riding down the street on his bike, all alone, no older siblings with him, to be the last Cutchins left at the elementary school. He couldn't sleep last night and wanted me to cuddle with him, so I did. How many more chances will I have? I sang him the lullabies that I haven't sung for years, and I stayed with him until he fell asleep. This morning, Wade said, "Wow. It's weird to have him going, and I'm not going with him." Tell me about it, Wade!!

And now I'm crying because we just got a letter from our missionary boy. He said he's sorry he's not here to help Dennis with some work we're doing around the house. He said he feels bad that he's been busy all week helping others, and his Dad is at home working alone. (Who are you and what did you do with my son??) He also said he really misses being able to talk to us and ask us our advice. He said, "You just don't realize how important something is until you don't have it anymore." And I caught a glimpse of the mature adult that seems to be taking the place of the handsome, eager, but immature young man that we sent out nearly two years ago.

These happy tears sting just a little because HOLY COW when did my children get to be so old? When did I get to be so old? (Insert Tevye singing "Sunrise, Sunset...") I love that I've had all these years to nuture them and take care of them, but I realize that now I'm going to have to learn new ways to be a mom, because they just don't need the same things that they used to. And it's kind of cool.

Although, I have to confess, it felt really, really good to sing those old bedtime songs. I guess I need to do that more often, just for old times' sake.

High in the Mountains...

2011-07-18T16:02:00.001-06:00

Just wanted to give a little wave as I head off for five glorious days at Girls' Camp.

Catch ya on the flip side!!

OUCH.

2011-07-15T16:25:00.001-06:00

I just got a really bad paper cut. It's, like, all the way down to the bone!! (That's a bit of an exaggeration). But it DID make me cry. Mostly because I was mad, but still, it made me cry.

And it made me hate, more than I already do, all those stupid credit card companies that send us two or three invitations A DAY (that is not an exaggeration) that I have to shred and shred and shred. What a colossal waste of paper. I will never, ever, ever, ever, ever get a credit card from a company that sends me one of those stupid invitations. It tells me that they don't know how to use their money wisely, and instead spend it on fancy, useless advertising. I hate those dumb things. A lot.

So if you're thinking that you want me to get a credit card from you, the last thing you'll want to do is send me a stupid invitation that makes me get a paper cut that's so bad that I have to cry.

Fair warning.

"I Missed Wordless Wednesday!"

2011-07-14T22:10:00.001-06:00

So said my Kate this afternoon.

I know, I know. I missed it, too!! I'm missing a lot of things lately. You know that phrase, "My plate is full?" Well, my plate is so full that I'm leaving a trail of crumbs that would make Hansel and Gretel proud!! I'm so tired that I've been a full thirty minutes late to work the past two days because I CANNOT wake up on time in the mornings! So what do I do? I sit down at the computer to blog at 10:00 at night. You can tell I'm a smart one.

So Kate, this one's for you.

And goodnight.

I've Been Everywhere, Man....

2011-07-09T16:54:00.003-06:00

Since June 17, I have traveled to:

St. George, Kansas
Manhattan, Kansas
Wamego, Kansas
Enid, Oklahoma
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Norman, Oklahoma
Memphis, Tennessee
Freeport, Florida
DeFuniak Springs, Florida
Grayton Beach, Florida
Chipley, Florida
Cottondale, Florida
West Memphis, Arkansas
Earle, Arkansas
and
Denver, Colorado

I have seen where my son has been serving his mission (but I did NOT see my son!), I have been on the flight line and in the control tower at Vance Air Force Base, I visited the Oklahoma City Memorial Site (very, VERY special place), and seen the hail damage on my brother-in-law's house. I stood on the football field in the stadium at Oklahoma University, I got tumbled around in the Gulf of Mexico, made a sand castle that looked like Goblin Valley, slept in the worst motel I have EVER been in, and watched the 4th of July fireworks over Elitch Gardens in Denver. I have driven over 4,000 miles and played nearly that many games of Solitaire and Words with Friends. I have driven through Utah, Wyoming, Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Mississippi, Alabama, Florida, Tennessee, and Colorado.

Man, I'm glad to be home!

Hot Fun in the Summertime

2011-06-29T09:25:00.000-06:00

Vance AFB, Enid, OK.

It's over 100 degrees here, so this is about all we can do and still be happy!!

We had so much fun visiting with Vaughn and Tami and the gang. Thanks guys, for a great time!!

What Happened to Wordless Wednesday??

2011-06-23T10:37:00.002-06:00

I tried and tried to post a Wordless Wednesday post yesterday, but for some reason, I couldn't get my picture to download. Then we had to go to the pool, and we swam and played until we were so exhausted, and then we had to hurry and pack up everything and get in the car and drive to Norman (OKLAHOOOOOMA!), so I never had a chance to post my picture.

So now, for your viewing pleasure, here is yesterday's Wordless Wednesday post:

Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-15T05:55:00.001-06:00

That's Just the Way It Is

2011-06-09T23:03:00.001-06:00

I wish the last SD card Paul sent home hadn't been ruined somehow, so that all those pictures are lost. It just makes me sick.

I wish that person that I desperately want to trust wouldn't keep dashing my hopes.

I wish my whole face didn't hurt from that dang root canal.

I wish our yard was all cleaned up from the patio dig. We still have two big piles of dirt, and one of them is sitting right where my pool should be.

I wish I had enough money that I didn't have to work two jobs.

I wish I had more than one day off to get a whole week's worth of housework done. (Sundays totally don't count as a day off...)

(Do you hear the little violin playing sympathetic music yet? Hmm.....neither do I....)

Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-08T18:33:00.000-06:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-01T04:44:00.001-06:00

Something Very Scary

2011-05-31T23:45:00.003-06:00

To tell you the truth, I'm not really scared of very many things. Well, not REALLY scared. I'm scared of scary movies, like, I just don't watch them. And I'm kind of scared of the dark. And I'm scared of things with bags over their heads. And I hate snakes, and lightning kind of gives me the shivers.

But I'm REALLY scared of earthquakes. And hurricanes. And tornadoes. And so the past few months have been scary for me. But I've been a brave girl, because after all, I haven't actually been in any of the places that these events have happened. But you'll never guess what I saw the other day when I was nervously watching the National Weather Service website as a huge line of storms moved across the midwest. And all the red "Tornado Warning" colors were right on top of Western Missouri.

I saw a Storm Report that said, "Touchdown Confirmed in Kearney."

And for just a second, my heart stopped beating, and I was very, very scared. All my prayers flew straight up to heaven, and I started to cry. That's how scared I was. Because my son is in Kearney. And the next few hours were the kind of hours that leave me feeling sick and exhausted. Thank goodness for a cool-headed husband and friends on the ground in Kearney who could check on him and make sure he was OK.

And he was OK, and I breathed again. And today he told me he will send pictures...which I'm not sure I have the stomach to look at. But I will look, and I will be so grateful that it wasn't any worse.

And then I'll work on my "stay cool and don't panic" skills. And to all my co-workers--my most sincere apologies for the very, very unprofessional behavior!!

You Can Thank Me Later

2011-05-26T12:33:00.002-06:00

Back when I used to be on Facebook, I was always jealous when I'd see an old friend from High School who looked all slim and trim and not a day over 30. And I'd feel sad because they were looking at pictures of me a full SEVENTY POUNDS heavier than I was when I graduated from High School. And they would say some stupid thing like, "Oh my gosh! You look exactly the same!"

And I would say it right out loud, to my computer and anyone else who happened to be in the room: "You are a LIAR."

Once, I ran into an old friend on campus. This is someone that I spent a great deal of time with back in the day. I was also walking with my husband, who is also friends with this friend. And the BUM didn't even recognize me. (Who did he think it was holding hands with my husband is what I want to know?!) That is what SEVENTY POUNDS will do, my friends.

But, I'd like to tell you all that you can thank me later for being the one who got fat, so you can all feel good about yourselves.

You're very welcome.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-05-25T19:34:00.000-06:00

To You, You Know Who You Are...

2011-05-23T13:07:00.000-06:00

Dear You,

I think you had a very difficult thing happen this past week. My heart is aching for you. I want to help, I want to be there for you, but I don't know exactly what to do. Your struggle is none of my business, but I love you and I care about what you are struggling with.

We've kind of had a long distance friendship, but we've always been there for each other, I think. You have been there for me many times, when I just needed some understanding or some sympathy. You've also been there for me when I needed a kick in the pants.

I really, really want to be there for you now. But I don't quite know how. I hope you are OK. I hope your family is OK. I sent you an email but I don't know if I have your right address, and I hesitate to call, because that might be too nosy. Please call me or send me an email, if you want to talk or whatever.

I'm worried about you.

With much love and many, many hugs,

Me

On a Quiet Sunday Evening

2011-05-22T21:06:00.000-06:00

I was sitting at the computer, writing a letter to my missionary. Dennis came in with his jacket on and said, "Hey, let's go for a walk!" (Actually, he said, "Fancy a walk?" but...I don't know...didn't seem like it wanted to come out that way when I typed it...)

I said, "No. I don't fancy a walk." I never fancy a walk when the dog is going, on account of that he's so freaking stupid, and tries to knock me down. I can do that all by myself, thankyouverymuch!

So Dennis went into the kitchen, and next thing I know, Kate is coming downstairs looking for her shoes. Apparently, she DOES fancy a walk. And plus, she said she didn't want Daddy to be lonely. (I'm such a loser wife...)

So off they went. Dennis and Kate and the Dumb Dog. I continued with my letter, until I got distracted by a sound. A loud sound. A loud, something-lashing-the-window sound. "Ooohh. It's raining!" I thought to myself. And I wondered how the walkers were faring.

And it wasn't just any rain--it was the kind of rain that goes sideways through the air in flying, swirling sheets. The walkers came home about 15 minutes later, drenched to the skin. Dripping hair, dripping faces, dripping shirts and pants. Dripping, I say!!

"How was your walk?" I ask. "GREAT!" they cried in joyful unison.

I TOTALLY should have gone!!!

Wordless Wednesday

2011-05-18T06:06:00.000-06:00

Looking Forward

2011-05-17T13:33:00.000-06:00

Things I am looking forward to (in no particular order):

1. The weekend
2. A family reunion
3. Our trip to Florida
4. Our trip to Lake Powell
5. My back getting better (this WILL happen, won't it???)
6. School getting out
7. Summer weather
8. Putting the new cushions on my porch swing
9. Fresh cherries
10. Setting up the pool

It would appear I am looking forward to summer. This has been the longest, wettest, coldest spring I can remember. And I can remember a LOT of springs!!

When I was in college, I remember that the lilacs were just starting to bloom when it was time to go home for the summer--and that would have been mid to late April. This year, it is mid May, and the lilacs just came on.

Although, to be fair, there must have been some sun somewhere, because Wade is already as brown as a little Indian, with a CRAZY farmer's tan.

So, Summer, I'm ready whenever you are!!

Wednesday with Words

2011-05-09T15:50:00.006-06:00

I know it should be Wordless Wednesday, but today, I have some words.

Just wanted to post about my amazing Mother's Day, in which I got to talk to my Missionary. He looks good and he sounds good and he's working hard and doing his best. I'm so proud of him. And it was SO GOOD to talk to him!!

There he is!
Thank goodness for SKYPE!

See? I told you he looks good.

Here was my bright idea...
"Let's take a family photo!" I said.
"Good idea!" my family said.

Yeah.
Good idea...

That's my boy!

And some things never change....

I told you.
He's still Paul!

And then he played his guitar for us.
He's very good, you know.

Good for my heart, that's what.

And that, my friends,
is what I call a
Happy Mother's Day!

Wordless Wednesday

2011-05-04T15:22:00.001-06:00

It Was SO Worth It!

2011-04-29T10:23:00.004-06:00

I bought my popcorn and caffeine and Chex Mix and cookies last night, and set my alarm for 1:45 AM. The rain coming through my open window at 1:00 AM woke me up, and then I was too excited to go back to sleep.

The last time I got up in the middle of the night to watch a Royal Wedding, I was 13 years old. I loved it then, and I loved it now! Back then, my parents let me bring the little black and white TV into my bedroom, and my cousin "slept" over. We stayed up all night, waiting for the wedding. I remember when Diana mispronounced Charles' name. I remember how nervous she looked. It all seemed so magical.

This time, I went to bed really early so I would be able to get up and still make it through the rest of the day. I made my Kate go to bed early too, so she could get up with me. We cheered when Princes William and Harry left Clarence House. I teared up when I saw the Queen. I sighed when Kate (now the Duchess of Cambridge) climbed into the car with her sweet Dad. Oh, the Pomp! Oh, the Ceremony! I almost missed The Kiss, because I was filling lunch boxes at that point. Good thing they gave me a Second Chance!!

And all those amazing British hats. Wow.

Now I feel ill from all the caffeine I ingested--could also be the lack of sleep. Who knows? WHO CARES? It was SO worth it!

photos courtesy of People Magazine

Wordless Wednesday

2011-04-27T06:48:00.002-06:00

A Very Important Moment in My Mothering Career

2011-04-26T21:28:00.012-06:00

There's so much to say, so much to tell, about what I learned over the past few weeks. I have been initiated into a whole new level of parenting. It's called PROM.

Prom is SUCH a bigger deal than it was when I was in High School!! But with Kate's guidance and unending patience, she helped me know what needs to be done to make Prom a special evening for your daughter.

Once all the asking and answering has been done (this activity is, in and of itself, a HUGE production, but I already knew that...) and she has a date, you hope he's organized and plans the evening. Then all you have to do is get a gown (good luck finding something modest), a clutch, shoes, jewelry, hair, nails, makeup, and a boutonniere. I suggest you start WEEKS in advance shopping--even before she has been asked, just to be safe.

You should also plan for your daughter to be gone most of the day of Prom. It is called a DAY DATE. This is worth skipping school, and don't bother arguing about it, because you won't win.

DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT schedule a chiropractor appointment for yourself the afternoon of Prom. This will not leave you enough time to get her hair done, especially if she has miles of hair like Kate does. If you find yourself getting home from the hair appointment at 5:00 and her date is picking her up at 5:45, just do the best you can. It doesn't do anyone any good if you get upset. Help your little girl with her nails and her makeup, and zip her into her beautiful satin gown, and hope your failing vision doesn't prevent you from seeing the microscopic hook and eye. Then you help her find her phone while her date is waiting downstairs and you're both whispering furtively because you haven't taken the traditional pictures yet, and she can't focus on anything else because she can't find her phone.

Carefully snap a photo or two while she's digging through the pockets of her jeans.

Try not to make too much noise taking photos
while her date is waiting downstairs.

Photograph The Descent
(and be glad the dirty dishes aren't
piled above the edge of the sink in the background!)

Watch while he puts on her lovely wrist corsage
(it had a pearly bracelet!!)

Hope she doesn't poke him
as she struggles with the boutonniere
(this would be worth practicing beforehand...)

Still working on it...

SUCCESS!
And HAPPINESS!!

The traditional "smile while Mom cries..."

"...and cries some more...."

Her carriage awaits,

And away they go!!

And then you go stand in the cold,
and wait,
for the actual PROMENADE.
If you want to sit, you have to buy a ticket.

But she's so beautiful,
and it's worth it to watch her
coming down the stairs, beaming.
You just pray and pray that
she doesn't trip!!

And then they go back up the stairs,
and you, and she, and he, breathe
a sigh of relief.

Then you go home and get warm,
and wait for her to come home
and tell you all about it.

And I suggest you let her sleep in the next morning!

Owie!!

2011-04-25T11:45:00.002-06:00

I just need to whine a little, I hope you don't mind.

Remember back in August when I took that graceful little spill out in front of my neighbor's house? And I broke my foot and wore that awesome boot around for two months? And then when I got the boot off my foot was so swollen and stiff that I still couldn't walk normally for several weeks? Right about that time (October, if you're counting), my back started hurting. It was just a little twinge now and then, kind of like maybe a pinched nerve or something. It got progressively worse, and I wondered if my ancient bed were somehow to blame...

So Dennis and I decided it was time for a new bed. My back was hurting, his knees and hips were hurting, and in 20+ years of marriage, we have never bought a new bed, so it was REALLY time.

Well, in spite of the new bed, my dang back kept hurting, and if you want to know the truth, it was getting worse. But these things usually go away on their own, right? RIGHT??!!??? Now that I'm several months older and wiser, I realize that I was OH. SO. WRONG.

I've been in pretty much constant pain for over six months now. I've been to the doctor, who prescribed anti-inflammatories, which I took faithfully for two weeks and didn't notice any difference until I stopped taking them. Then I noticed a significant increase in the pain. Then I ventured into the new and painful world of chiropractic medicine. I got lucky because the chiropractor I've been seeing also uses accupuncture and Chinese herbal medicine to promote healing. YAY! Needles, my favorite!! And since I've been seeing the chiropractor, the pain has been at least double what it was, plus new pain, including bruises, where I have been "treated" by the sadistic torture man (I meant to say chiropractor, but my fingers slipped a little...)

So I find myself at an impasse. I actually really like the sadistic torture man, he's really nice and funny, except when he's trying to beat me to death or twist my head off or poke my back full of electric needles. But I'm in so much pain, and it ebbs and flows, and I'm starting to worry that it won't ever get any better.

The chiropractor said he's pretty sure that after my foot injury, with all my limping and hobbling, I irritated something in my back, and then never took care of it so it could get better (he used some right proper medical terms to describe this to me, but since I don't speak right proper medical, I can't be expected to remember any of it).

So I find myself not sleeping well, in pain 90% of the time (loose estimate, that), cranky and sad. I don't know if I should keep seeing that dang torture man--he's confident that he can fix it, but he makes me cry, and I don't like it! Or is there another route of treatment I could try that won't hurt and that will help me feel better? I feel pretty darn sorry for myself, that's for sure! (As if you couldn't tell--you can thank me later for pointing out the obvious...)

Yeah, and it's raining today, too. Happy Monday!

:-(

Time Well Spent

2011-04-21T18:30:00.004-06:00

I just spent twenty minutes composing the perfect comment for a friend's blog. Ironically, the blog was about not wanting to cook dinner. Ever. And as you may note, right this minute it is dinner time. And you may also note that I am not currently fixing dinner. I'm posting on my blog.

With every word I type, every phrase I write, the minutes tick away and bring me closer to the dreaded moment that I began considering before I even got out of bed this morning. The moment when I confess that I don't want to fix dinner. I think about it before I even eat breakfast. What will I fix for dinner tonight? Usually, I have no answer to this query. Even immediately after I return from the grocery store, I have no answer. Right this minute, there is hamburger thawed in the fridge. There is a recipe book open on the counter. All the ingredients are waiting for me, all I have to do is get up out of my chair, walk up the stairs and into the kitchen, and cook the dang meal.

But you know what? That ain't gonna happen. BLEH. That's about all I have to say about that. BLEH. BLeh. blEh. BlEh. (Oh great, now I'm getting all eloquent, and nobody wants that...)

Help.

(But please don't advise me about the crock pot, or the weekly menu, or the planning ahead. What I really need is a maid and a cook. A hot tub would be nice, too.)

Little Caesar's, here I come! I'll probably stop at Krispy Kreme on my way home.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-04-20T12:53:00.001-06:00

Italian Cream Cake

2011-04-14T00:00:00.000-06:00

2 c. sugar
1/2 c. shortening
1 stick butter
5 egg yolks
1 tsp. vanilla
2 c. flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1 c. buttermilk
5 egg whites
1 c. pecans, chopped
1 c. lightly packed coconut

Cream butter, shortening, and sugar. Add egg yolks, one at a time. Add vanilla. Sift dry ingredients together and add alternately with buttermilk. Add coconut and nuts. Beat egg whites until they are stiff and fold into mixture. Pour into four 8 in. round cake pans or three 9 or 10 in. round cake pans. (Grease pans and line bottom with wax paper for easiest removal). Bake at 350 for 25-30 minutes. Let cool until pans are finger warm before removing cakes from pans. Cool completely before frosting or you'll be really sorry.

Icing:
1 8 oz. package cream cheese, room temperature
1/2 stick butter, room temperature
3 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
2 T. milk, if needed
1 c. nuts, chopped (I use pecans)

Cream butter and cheese. Gradually add sugar. Add vanilla and beat until creamy. If needed, add milk. Frost cake and sprinkle with nuts on top and sides.

Helpful hints:
*Chill the egg whites before beating--they'll whip up a LOT faster.
*Don't use your mixer once the coconut is in the batter--it's super messy.
*The icing tends to be runny--add more powdered sugar if you want to.
*This recipe doesn't make enough icing, in my opinion, to really fill between layers and still have enough to frost the cake. It takes a batch and a half of icing to do a good job.
*This cake should be refrigerated because of the icing. When you want to eat a piece, the cake is cold, and not as delicious that way. If you spread a little butter on the cake, and then put it in the microwave for 20 seconds, you'll be able to enjoy a little bit of heaven.
*WARNING: This cake is delicious. And very rich. Don't try to eat the whole thing yourself, even over several days. Invite your friends over to share, or heaven forbid, you're going to end up with a figure like mine. Consider yourself warned!!

Wordless Wednesday

2011-04-13T08:15:00.002-06:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-04-06T06:00:00.000-06:00

When It's Springtime in the Rockies...

2011-04-03T19:46:00.005-06:00

BEFORE

AFTER

I shouldn't be surprised.
But still...
My poor flowers!

What Have I Done???

2011-03-29T21:17:00.003-06:00

In a COMPLETELY irrational fit of "I'm TOO FAT and need to do something about it!" I decided to get a haircut. A big one. And some highlights. Oh my goodness, what HAVE I DONE? Oh, please help. Anyone ever tried liposuction? How about brain removal?

Not the Cake I Wanted...

2011-03-25T06:00:00.003-06:00

Whew. Another Pinewood Derby in the books. Not my very favorite activity, if you want to know the truth. But the cake auction was a success, and Isaac had a grand time, racing and racing until he didn't want to race anymore.

I bid (ha ha, I just typed "bit" instead of "bid," that would have been funny!!)...I digress... I BID on about ten different cakes because I wanted to be sure and win SOMETHING! After I slaved over my delicious Italian Cream Cake, I didn't want to go home empty handed. I even bid on my own cake, because that's the one I REALLY wanted. I didn't win my cake. But I won three others. Yes, you read that right. THREE others. Oh yeah.

My co-workers don't know it yet, but they're about to have a great day.

Here is my delicious cake.

Your life will never be the same

once you taste this bit of heaven.

Here's Isaac with his SUPER CUTE Pinewood Derby car.

He and the other Wolves got to do the Flag Ceremony.

My sweet little flag-bearer.
He was embarrassed, but I thought it was cute
when he tripped on the flag...

The first race.

As you can see, he won.

And he's excited!

You can tell that he's about to say,

"Oh YEAH! First place!!"

Waiting in line for another turn to race.

After the Cubs had all raced,

they opened up the track to anyone who wanted

a chance.

Brother Miner pulled out his car

from yesteryear,

donned his "racing goggles,"

and jumped right in there.

I LOVE Brother Miner!

(Notice the graphite fingers on the little fellow on the left!!)

The only real downer to the evening was that right in the middle of our awesome Pinewood Derby, BYU had to go and lose their dumb basketball game. Thank goodness we had all that cake to cheer us up!!

And now that the Derby is over, I can start thinking of ways to afford a PROM DRESS....

A Sad Dog

2011-03-24T21:27:00.000-06:00

Someone is very sad because there's a big mess in the backyard. The patio is being broken up and replaced, and there's a pile of concrete, and a muddy, rocky spot where the patio used to be.

Can you tell who's the sad one?

A Little Bit of This and That

2011-03-24T06:00:00.000-06:00

Kate got asked to Prom last night. He put footprints from the front door, down the hall, down the stairs, across the family room, and into Kate's bedroom. He put a handful of Hershey's Kisses on each footprint, and at the end of the trail, where there were also Kisses all over the floor, a little sign read, "Now that I've 'kissed' the ground you walk on, will you go to PROM with me?"

I was singing "I Feel Pretty" (you know, West Side Story) while I was doing the dishes last night. I'm sure it sounded really, REALLY good, but when the doorbell rang, I realized that whoever was at the door had probably enjoyed a bit of my impromptu performance. I was embarrassed.

I stayed up really late last night fooling around on Google Earth. I was checking out a town in Taiwan where I have a friend on a mission, then I tought I might as well look around in Japan, and then I was in Dortmund, Germany looking for the Alter Benninghofer Strasse (but I couldn't find it because everything in Dortmund is called Alter Something-or-other, if you can believe that...). From there it was a logical hop, skip, and jump to Pakistan where I checked out K-2, which, oh man, you can kinda get a feel for, even on Google Earth. It was awesome. I visited the Eiffel Tower and Versailles, too, while I was at it. I found the U.S.S. Arizona Memorial in Pearl Harbor. Then of course I went to Kearney, MO. Too bad I couldn't spot the Mormon Missionaries...

When I went to bed last night my poor sleepy husband had sprawled himself over every available sleeping surface of our bed, and after a few gentle attempts to get him to consolidate himself, I went and slept in Isaac's bed. Isaac's bed is empty lately, because he has taken to sleeping, not only in Wade's bedroom, but right in Wade's bed. With Wade. All cuddled up.

Tonight I made a delicious dinner. Wade thanked Dad, who had been home for all of twenty minutes, for the great meal. Dennis said, "Don't thank me! Mom made dinner!" Wade was surprised. I guess he didn't know that I know how to make dinner.

Isaac and Dennis have made a Pinewood Derby car for Isaac. It is a red crayon and it is terribly, terribly darling. I will post a picture of it later. At the Pinewood Derby there will also be a cake auction, for which I am creating my famous Italian Cream Cake. I hope someone buys it, or I will feel bad. Actually, I take that back. If no one buys it, I will be more than happy to bring it home and eat it myself!

And there you have it. I little bit of this and a little bit of that.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-03-23T20:02:00.002-06:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-03-16T07:00:00.001-06:00

In No Particular Order...

2011-03-15T21:54:00.006-06:00

POST EDIT: Yes, these ARE in a particular order. (Thank you, Kate...) This one is FIRST. Always and forever.

Just had to get that out of my system!!

Wordless Wednesday

2011-03-09T22:17:00.001-07:00

Some Enchanted Evening...

2011-03-04T18:20:00.002-07:00

You may see a dog, peeking through a hole in the fence...

Oh wait. That is not what I wanted to post about!
I wanted to post about an enchanted evening
when my beautiful daughter got all dressed up
and looked like a princess,
and went to the Sweetheart's Ball.

Isn't she lovely???

I think she looked absolutely stunning.
In fact, her cute date *gasped* when he saw her!
(He's a smart one!!)

Amazing hair.
And yes, that is ALL HERS.

And aren't they darling?!
I call him Mickey, even though that's not his name,
because I think he looks like Mickey Rooney.

OK, this is the NEXT DAY,
after she slept on it,
and wore it to church all day!
Serious hairspray.

I think this is as amazing as the updo itself!
(And rather crunchy....)

All brushed out and WAY too poofy for her taste,
but since I'm a child of the '80s,
I LOVE IT!!

Now, we went dress shopping together, and we picked out the perfect cute shoes, and I took her to get her hair done. And we had so much fun together. I did her nails and her makeup, and I fussed over her. I calmly answered the door when Mickey came to pick her up, and I smiled when he *gasped* at her radiant beauty. They humored me while I took some pictures, and then he helped her put on her pretty sweater, and we discussed curfew. Then he opened the door and took my girl out into the night. I smiled and waved, but when he offered her his arm, so sweet and gallant, I burst into tears. Quickly, I shut the door so they wouldn't see me, but Kate told me after she came home, that when he did that, she whispered, "I bet you just made my Mom cry!"

Does she know me, or what?

And I just wonder, how many more chances will I have to fuss over her like this?

Not enough. Not nearly enough.

Savory Moment #5

2011-03-03T06:00:00.001-07:00

You may have noticed a disturbing lack of Savory Moments lately. I certainly have. That's partly because I've been so busy that I don't even know which day it is. And it's partly because my head (and my heart) have been inside a little black raincloud. Actually, a whole thunderhead.

Anyway.

The clouds may or may not be parting, it's hard to tell sometimes. I know that I've had a headache for about three weeks, and today I didn't have one, so that's a really good sign. But today, it occurred to me that no matter how bad it gets, I'm going to be OK. I can do this.

And that, my friends, is a Savory Moment.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-03-02T21:43:00.002-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-02-23T15:15:00.002-07:00

When I Get a Minute...

2011-02-18T12:48:00.003-07:00

When I get a minute, I want to tell you all about my new friend in Wamego, Kansas. And I want to tell you about my trip to Disneyland with the high school orchestra and choir. And about the awesome pictures Paul sent home the other day. And also I want to tell you about how Wade accidently sang "Happy Birthday" when he meant to be saying a prayer. And I want to tell you how excited Isaac is that I finally signed him up for baseball. I also want to tell you how unhappy Wade and Isaac will be when I tell them that I want them to take piano lessons (and NOT from me). I might also like to mention that I'm SUPER tired, and am still carrying around something thick and heavy in my sinuses. AND, when I get a minute, I'm going to post pictures of Kate when she gets all dressed up to go to the Sweetheart's Ball tomorrow. I'm so excited! But right now I'm busy, so it will have to wait...

Wordless Wednesday

2011-02-16T15:13:00.002-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-02-09T08:09:00.001-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-02-02T15:08:00.002-07:00

Savory Moment #4

2011-01-31T10:01:00.002-07:00

I get the post-Christmas blues pretty bad. I love the holidays so much that I don't get the blues before, but after, when all the fun is packed away and I've shopped the sales and bought more lights for next year (yahoo!!), I feel sad. It's cold, and being cold makes me tired. And it's dark, and the sun doesn't shine for days at a time.

The other day I was moping around the house, and I suddenly wished for flowers. Lots of flowers, growing in my garden and filling my yard with colorful glory. I considered the plastic flowers I've seen at the dollar store--I could buy a bunch of those and poke them in the ground, just to help me make it until spring when I can plant...

OH!! WAIT!! I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING WONDERFUL!!!!

Guess what I did last fall? I planted HUNDREDS of bulbs in my garden!! I just remembered! I had forgotten all about those little sleeping bunches of JOY! Tulips, daffodils, hyacinths (my very, very favorite!!) and crocus.

When I remembered those bulbs in my garden, just waiting until spring to BURST out of the winter mud, I was SO HAPPY!! I had planned ahead for the winter blues, and then I forgot all about it. Now I am excited about my bulbs, and I'm excited for my flowers. And if you drive past my house in April or May and you see me laying on the front walk with my face in the dirt, don't worry. I'm OK! I'll have my nose in the hyacinths and I'll be breathing the life back into my wintery spirit.

A Deep and Abiding Love

2011-01-28T11:02:00.007-07:00

There are things I love about the months between October and February. It's not the greatest time of year weather-wise, but there are oh so many other wonderful things. Things that make the sunless winter months bearable, even fun, for me.

The first is obviously Halloween.
I LOVE Halloween.

I also love Thanksgiving.
Mostly I love pie.

And OH.
How I love Christmas.
I really, really love Christmas.

I also generally love winter.
I love fresh snow,
and don't even mind old, yucky snow!

But the best thing, the very, VERY BEST THING about these holiday-full months is this...this one thing, this important, special thing:

Chocolate covered marshmallow things.
Pumpkins, turkeys, santas, hearts, and even sometimes eggs!
Oh the joy!
The inexpressible pleasure
of a chocolate covered
marshmallow ANYTHING!

I LIVE for the moment, early in October, when the first chocolate covered pumpkins hit the shelves. I stash, and I hoarde, and I sneak, and I hide my chocolatey, marshmallowy heaven so nobody else will eat it. In my sock drawer, in my nightstand drawer, in my desk at work, at the back of the cupboard...I put them there so I always have one when I need it (which may surprise you to know is NOT all the time. Just sometimes). My heart beats faster when I remember that I have a treat to look forward to. And I make myself wait. An hour? Thirty minutes? Until the news is over? Until I've eaten my healthy lunch? It's my special treat, and I love it. I love it loveitloveitloveit.

It's my favorite thing about this time of year.

And I prefer Russell Stover, if you were wondering....

Wordless Wednesday

2011-01-26T20:50:00.002-07:00

Savory Moment #3

2011-01-25T08:43:00.004-07:00

Last night I was crying. I was missing my missionary, and feeling extra bad because I got news that someone had mistreated him--pretty badly, I thought. He didn't seem that upset by it, but it just hit me at the wrong moment, and I started worrying that no one is taking care of him. He's in a new area, he needs new shirts, it's bitter cold, his ride stood him up, so did his dinner appointment, boo hoo hoo.

I said to my husband, feeling on the edge of despair, "No one is helping him! They left him stranded, and he had to walk 10 miles in the dark and it's TEN FREAKING DEGREES!" My heart was ready to break.

Kate was sitting across the room reading, and she looked at me and said, very calmly, "Mom. He's never stranded. He's a missionary."

And the thing that happened next was kind of miraculous. My troubled heart was calmed. Immediately. And completely. That never happens to me! I have to talk myself into calming down, and work at it and take deep breaths and use half of a box of tissues. I tried to ignore it, and I used my sassy voice in my mind, but the peaceful feeling covered my fear and eased my heart. It was a tangible warm feeling, and I couldn't deny it. I knew that my daughter was right. My son is never stranded. He's a missionary. And the Lord watches out for his servants--and their Moms.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-01-19T15:20:00.002-07:00

The Good, the Bad, and the UGLY

2011-01-18T20:47:00.003-07:00

THE GOOD

Isaac is SUCH A DOLL! He had Cub Scouts tonight, and got all dressed up in his uniform. Blue pants, his new belt, his scout shirt, his red vest, his neckerchief, his new neckerchief slide, and his new Cub Scout baseball cap. I've never had a child so excited for scouts. Third time's the charm? Maybe? He's just so cute all dressed up and sitting on the chair by the door, clutching his little scout book and waiting until it's time to walk out the door.

THE BAD

Today I hate Savory Moments. Stupid idea. Now I always feel guilty if I'm crabby. And today, I'M CRABBY. SUPER crabby. Actually, crabby probably isn't the right word. Depressed? Sad? Overwhelmed? Yes, thank you.

THE UGLY

Just to give you an idea of how depressedsadoverwhelmed I'm feeling tonight, I laid my head down on the dinner table (while everyone else was kind enough to eat the EPIC FAIL meal I had prepared. Yay for me--I cooked. But I didn't eat it.) and willed myself to disappear. It didn't work, so I decided to retire from teaching. I think I'm losing my touch. And I thought I'd sell my flute. Or quit my job. Or both. Or something. Oh, wait, then how would I pay my bills? Crap.

Yeah. I'm going to see if I can sleep this one off. Before it gets any UGLIER.

p.s. I freaking miss Paul.

Savory Moment #2

2011-01-16T22:11:00.003-07:00

Tonight I've been practicing accompaniments for my students for Solo/Ensemble. I'm working on Quantz, Joncieres, Rutter, and Jacob. My hands are getting tired, and Isaac just told me that Dad is getting annoyed with the song I keep playing (this is not the Savory Moment). I stopped to rest a bit, and out of the depths of the basement, I hear my daughter's beautiful flute playing. She's struggling with the flute solo in the last movement of Dvorak IV. She's doing great, but she's way under tempo, and that's OK, because she's practicing under tempo, just the way I taught her to. She'll do it over and over and over until it feels comfortable, and then she'll speed it up just a little bit, and do it over and over and over again. Then she'll speed it up just a little more, and do it over and over and over. She'll keep doing this until it's fast enough, and by then it will be perfect. It takes time and patience, and tolerance from those around her who get annoyed with the repetition. The Savory Moment is that I know life works the same way.

Wordless Wendesday

2011-01-12T20:57:00.003-07:00

Well, not THIS Wednesday, but from now on, Wednesdays will be Wordless Wednesdays. I'll post an awesome picture, and I won't say anything at all. You can just enjoy it, and I'll have a record of some great memories throughout the year.

So without further ado:

Savory Moments, Part 1

2011-01-11T13:32:00.005-07:00

I tend to be a "glass half empty" kind of girl. I don't like that about myself, and over the years, I have made multiple attempts at change. Some attempts go better than others. I like to think of it as a process, though. You know, I try, and I move forward, and then I try some more, and then I move forward some more. And then I quit and slip back a little, but then I try again. Yes, definitely a process.

Well, here's the thing. I have a great life. A great husband and great kids. A great home and great family and friends. A great job. But I'm frequently grouchy and ungrateful. In my introspective moments, which seem to come more and more frequently the older I get, I know that I need to change that attitude. I need to enjoy the journey a little more, if you will.

So here's what I'm gonna do. I am going to Savor the Moment. The moments come every day. And I notice them. I do. But I don't think about them very long because I'm so stressed and busy. My goal is to notice them and record them. That way when I'm in an extra poopy mood, I can look back and remember the Savory Moments. (Did I just write the word "poopy?" Nice...)

So, without further ado, here is SAVORY MOMENT #1:

Last night, I got the most wonderful email. It was from a lady who lives in Wamego, Kansas, where my son has been serving on his mission for the last seven months. He loved serving there, and was sad to leave when he got transferred last week. This sweet sister, whom I will proudly and forever call Friend, took the time to write to me and tell me how wonderful my son is. She told me how he taught her nine year-old daughter how to care for her American Girl pony, how he split the seam of his pants learning to be a Russian Dancer, how he ruined his suit coat by putting it in the washing machine, how he comforted his homesick companion on Christmas Day. She told me how the (not LDS) clerk in the grocery store asked her husband, "Where's that kid with the belt buckle? He was a good egg." She told me that my son is a good missionary and a hard worker.

I cried, and then I printed out the letter, and I took it to bed with me and held it while I slept. Savory Moment, indeed.

Need a Lift?

2010-12-20T10:43:00.006-07:00

Carol Of Joy

Green leaves all fallen, withered and dry;
Brief sunset fading, dim winter sky.
Lengthening shadows,
Dark closing in...

Then, through the stillness, carols begin!
Oh fallen world, to you is the song--
Death holds you fast and night tarries long.

Jesus is born, your curse to destroy!
Sweet to your ears, a carol of Joy!

Pale moon ascending, solemn and slow;
Cold barren hillside, shrouded in snow;
Deep, empty valley veiled by the night;
Hear angel music--hopeful and bright!

Oh fearful world, to you is the song--
Peace with your God, and pardon for wrong!
Tidings for sinners, burdened and bound--

A carol of joy!

A Saviour is found!

Earth wrapped in sorrow, lift up your eyes!
Thrill to the chorus filling the skies!
Look up sad hearted--witness God's love!
Join in the carol swelling above!

Oh friendless world, to you is the song!
All Heaven's joy to you may belong!
You who are lonely, laden, forlorn--
Oh fallen world!
Oh friendless world!

To you,

A Saviour is born!

Music by Dan Forrest
Text by Eileen Berry

A Sad Day in Provo

2010-12-17T10:43:00.006-07:00

The Provo Tabernacle. A landmark in Provo since 1883, destroyed by fire December 17, 2010. I took these photos this morning between 6:30 and 6:45 am. I cried.

This last photo is courtsey of the Deseret News website.

The news reports are saying officials aren't sure yet if the building will be a total loss, but I'm thinking it will be; the damage is extensive. I hope they rebuild. I really do. But I'm just sick about the organ.

It's a sad day in Provo.

Holiday Beauty Tips

2010-12-11T13:20:00.003-07:00

During this busy, but wonderful, time of the year, I thought it might be nice to share a few of my personal beauty secrets. These are just my little tips to help you look and feel your best for the holidays!

1. Get plenty of rest. Go to bed by 2:00 am, and don't you dare get up before 6:00!! You need at LEAST four hours of sleep to have the energy and brain power necessary to accomplish everything you need to do each day.

2. Eat healthy foods. Chocolate tops the list. Eat at least four chocolate covered marshmallow santas every day. Chex Mix is also a good source of salt to help keep your blood pressure up. It's important to keep your strength up with all the calories. Take advantage of every office party, every neighborhood party, every treat your friends bring you. Eat it ALL.

3. Take good care of your skin. All that sleep you're getting will help, as will the chocolate, but going out in the cold, stressing over the business you must attend to, sleeping with your make up on, and wiping your runny nose as often as necessary will keep your skin.... Well, it will keep your skin. But just barely.

4. Tend to your nails. First of all, what to do for those skanky toenails? Don't even bother with a pedicure. You don't have time, and you're wearing shoes and woolen socks all the time, even to bed. So who cares what your feet look or feel like? Sandpaper heels are especially attractive, so don't you dare use a pumice for at least four months. For your fingernails, save time and money on a manicure by just nibbling them off. You'll feel extra attractive at all your holiday events with cracked and bloody nails. Plus, they just feel awesome.

5. Dress your best each day. Wear your favorite bulky hoodie and your most professional-looking sweats. If you want to be extra festive, buy a new pair in bright santa claus red. Make sure you wear the same outfit three or four days in a row to save time on choosing a different sweatshirt. Chunky boots, or your lawn mowing tennis shoes are a good choice of footwear to complete your holiday look.

6. Most importantly, be sure to say YES to everything anyone asks you to do, come to, or take care of. The more activities you pile on your proverbial plate, the more stress and worry you can create, which remember, is so good for your skin! (Not to mention your growing ulcer...take care of that little friend!!)

The holidays are such a busy and happy time. It's important to remember these helpful tips so you'll be ready to enjoy all your holiday activities.

Good luck!!

It Must Be Quite Important...

2010-12-07T13:19:00.005-07:00

Thanks to Sandra Boynton for helping me say what needs to be said:

We're very very busy and we've got a lot to do

and we haven't got a minute to explain it all to you

for on SundayMondayTuesday there are people we must see

and on WednesdayThursdayFriday we're as busy as can be

with our most important meetings and our most important calls

and we have to do so many things and post them on the walls.

Then we have to hurry south and then we hurry north

and we're talking every minute as we hurry back and forth

and we have to hurry to the east and then we hurry west

and we're talking every minute and we don't have time to rest

and we have to do it faster or it never will be done

and we have no time for listening or anything that's fun.

And we have to hurry to the left and then we hurry right

and we're talking every minute as we hurry day and night

and we have to have our lunches though we don't have time to chew

and we have to order many things in gray and navy blue

but we think supplies are limited (restrictions may apply)

so we'll call the operators who are surely standing by.

Now we have to hurry far away and then we hurry near

and we have to hurry everywhere and be both there and here

and we have to send out messages by e-mail, phone and fax

and we're talking every minute and we really can't relax

and we think there is a reason to be running neck-and-neck

and it must be quite important but we don't have time to check.

Yes, we think there is a reason to be running neck-and-neck

and it must be quite important. And if not...

well, what the heck.

Enjoy the Holidays!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

2010-11-22T19:33:00.006-07:00

TODAY

TOMORROW

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Snickers

2010-11-21T15:16:00.004-07:00

Every once in a while one of my children will do something that just makes me laugh. Here is the latest from Isaac:

Elevator Etiquette

2010-11-15T21:21:00.004-07:00

For a happier workplace, please, please, please pay attention to the following when using the elevator:

1. Stand back from the door, both inside and outside the elevator. Nobody wants your mug in their face as soon as the doors open. (Yes, I know you're very handsome and an incredibly smart and eligible Mechanical Engineering student, but I'm taken. Sorry.)

2. People exiting the elevator have the right of way. If you are outside the elevator, stand back and wait for those inside to exit before you attempt to enter the elevator. If you are inside the elevator, you might want to wait a second before attempting to exit because someone is bound to plow you down if you don't.

3. Don't text as you walk in to or out of the elevator. It prevents you from looking to see if there is anyone else on the planet, or even in the elevator. If you are texting, it is probable that you will be the one doing the plowing, and this makes YOU the dork, not the person you plowed into.

If any of these common courtesies seem difficult to understand, or seem unfair to you, the stairs are directly behind you and around the corner. Please use them.

Thank you.

Marianne's Motto

2010-11-07T21:58:00.005-07:00

Today in Relief Society we had an awesome lesson. I'm positive that it was a direct answer to my prayers, and although I'm sure many others benefitted from this lesson, I'm also sure that it was for me. ME.

He heard my prayers and used another pair of hands--four pairs, in this case--to help me find the answer I have been seeking. And I know the women who shared very tender feelings and horribly difficult experiences as part of this lesson did it because their hearts were led to do so, because He knew it is what I needed. I'm so grateful to these wonderful women for sharing. They didn't know, I'm sure, why they needed to do it. But I know.

I like to have a personal motto--a "Team Cheer," for Team Marianne. Former mottos, that have not been retired, but have taken their places as steps in my journey are "Try a Little Harder to Be a Little Better," and "Find Joy in the Journey," and "Be a Mother Who Knows." Oh, and don't forget these ones, "I Think I Can, I Think I Can!" and "Never Give Up, Never Surrender!" Well, here's my new motto:

TODAY'S TRIALS ARE TOMORROW'S TESTIMONY

I have the resources to not only endure, but to emerge triumphant from the trials that I have experienced and am experiencing and will experience. Sometimes, for WHATEVER reason, I don't use the resources available to me, but as long as I come back and keep trying, as long as I don't give up, I will be the winner. And I love to win. I think having a testimony makes me a winner, and if my trials are what takes me there, then I guess I'll hop on board.

Testimony, here I come!

Thanks, Janna.

A Little Bit of Broken Heart

2010-11-04T21:45:00.005-06:00

We had a bit of heartache around here last week. I shouldn't be blogging about it, because I'm not exactly at liberty to divulge the nature of the ache, but I want to share a few things I learned:

1. Crying helps.

2. Yelling really loud in the car when no one can hear you helps (although it scares the kids on the school bus who might happen to look your way while you're looking like some kind of wide-mouth banshee).

3. Printing out hundreds of old family photos helps.

4. An hour of peace and rest helps, if you know what I mean.

5. I've heard time helps, but I'm still waiting on that one to kick in.

6. And in the end, you have to turn it over to Him, because sometimes, there is nothing else you can do.

I think Kris Kringle put it pretty well when he sang, "Put one foot in front of the other, and soon you'll be walking 'cross the flo-o-or. Put one foot in front of the other, and soon you'll be walking out the door!"

I'm walkin'!

Happy Halloween

2010-10-23T12:46:00.007-06:00

What do you think?

It's one of our best.

EVER.

(Thanks Simply Julie for sharing!!)

Going Out On a Limb

2010-10-20T06:00:00.001-06:00

I don't blog about a lot of things because I am afraid I will offend someone or say something that will make someone feel bad. But today, I'm going to go ahead and run the risk of hurting feelings. I made a decision a few weeks ago that several people have asked me about, so I'm going to explain myself. And that's ALL I'm doing, just explaining my reasons, not stating any facts, not making any judgements. Just telling you why I did it.

I left Facebook.

I know! I'm crazy, right?! Well, actually, I don't think so. I'll tell you why I did it. I'm not telling you you have to do it.

1. I spent too much time there, snooping in other people's lives, watching them do nothing much, just like me.

2. I got tired of reading status updates that, although entertaining, probably weren't telling me what I really wanted to know, which is "Why are you on Facebook and not doing something useful?"

3. Most of my Facebook friends were teenagers. Nothing wrong with teenagers, but I don't think my kids' friends are REALLY my friends. 388 Facebook friends does NOT a true friendship make.

4. I felt VERY uncomfortable when some of my LDS friends started posting things against President Packer's last Conference address. Call me old-fashioned, but I think you're treading on pretty thin ice when you do things like that. And I'm not comfortable on ANY kind of ice, especially that kind. If it hadn't been this event, they would have found something else to protest about. I'm not a protestor. And I don't want to be involved in any way with your protest. So don't even ask me.

5. I felt that it was the right thing for me to do.

6. I could NEVER get the highest score on Bejeweled Blitz. And when I closed my eyes, I could see falling jewels. Definitely time to get out.